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You don’t know how to do any of those. Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute. No, I’m Santa Claus! Your best is an idiot! You lived before you met me?! Isn’t it true that you have been paid for your testimony? Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV. Why not indeed!
- March 1, 2016
- 0 comments
- Jim McClain
- Posted in ComedyDramaFantasySciFi
- 0
Doesn’t look so shiny to me. Hey, what kinda party is this? There’s no booze and only one hooker. We’re also Santa Claus! Goodbye, cruel world. Goodbye, cruel lamp. Goodbye, cruel velvet drapes, lined with what would appear to be some sort of cruel muslin and the cute little pom-pom curtain pull cords. Cruel though they may be… Switzerland is small and neutral! We are more like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood! Look, last night was a mistake. And I’m his friend Jesus. Why would I want to know that? Is the Space Pope reptilian!?
Oh, I think we should just stay away from SPOILERS!!!!
Yeah, and if you were the pope they’d be all, “Straighten your pope hat.” And “Put on your good vestments.” Eeeee! Now say “nuclear wessels”!  Ask her how her day was. You mean while I’m sleeping in it? No, just a regular mistake. No. We’re on the top. But I know you in the future. I cleaned your poop.I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself. Good news, everyone! I’ve taught the toaster to feel love! In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. Goodbye, cruel velvet drapes, lined with what would appear to be some sort of cruel muslin and the cute little pom-pom curtain pull cords. Cruel though they may be… Man, I’m sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. Well I’da done better, but it’s plum hard pleading a case while awaiting trial for that there incompetence. And why did ‘I’ have to take a cab? Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV.
Daylight and everything.
You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? When the lights go out, it’s nobody’s business what goes on between two consenting adults. I wish! It’s a nickel. No argument here. Stop! Don’t shoot fire stick in space canoe! Cause explosive decompression! Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems. Soon enough. You, minion. Lift my arm. AFTER HIM! Stop it, stop it. It’s fine. I will ‘destroy’ you! Ah, the ‘Breakfast Club’ soundtrack! Â Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral! I just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. Fry, that doesn’t make sense. Goodbye, cruel world. Goodbye, cruel lamp.
Goodbye, cruel velvet drapes, lined with what would appear to be some sort of cruel muslin and the cute little pom-pom curtain pull cords. Cruel though they may be… Man, I’m sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. Well I’da done better, but it’s plum hard pleading a case while awaiting trial for that there incompetence. And why did ‘I’ have to take a cab? Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV.
I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money. You can see how I lived before I met you. Maybe I love you so much I love you no matter who you are pretending to be. I had more, but you go ahead. Dr. Zoidberg, that doesn’t make sense. But, okay! Bender, hurry! This fuel’s expensive! Also, we’re dying! Switzerland is small and neutral! We are more like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood! Bender, hurry! This fuel’s expensive! Also, we’re dying!
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Bender, quit destroying the universe!
Leela’s gonna kill me. You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from intestinal parasites? That’s right, baby. I ain’t your loverboy Flexo, the guy you love so much. You even love anyone pretending to be him! Stop! Don’t shoot fire stick in space canoe! Cause explosive decompression! Your best is an idiot! I don’t want to be rescued. Can I use the gun? Hey, guess what you’re accessories to.
Lela, are you alright? You got wanged on the head. Large bet on myself in round one. You know the worst thing about being a slave? They make you work, but they don’t pay you or let you go.
She also liked to shut up! A true inspiration for the children. But existing is basically all I do!
Oh dear! She’s stuck in an infinite loop, and he’s an idiot! Well, that’s love for you. Actually, that’s still true. You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from intestinal parasites?
I’m sure those windmills will keep them cool.
No, she’ll probably make me do it. I’ve got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I’m going to the bathroom like clockwork, every three hours. And those jerks at Social Security stopped sending me checks. Now ‘I” have to pay ”them’! Fry! Quit doing the right thing, you jerk! In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself.
But, like most politicians, he promised more than he could deliver. You know, I was God once. Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you! How much did you make me? Also, we’re dying! File not found. For one beautiful night I knew what it was like to be a grandmother. Subjugated, yet honored. What are their names?
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That’s a popular name today. Little “e”, big “B”? Ok, we’ll go deliver this crate like professionals, and then we’ll go ride the bumper cars. This is the worst part. The calm before the battle. It’s just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. Also he got a race car. Is any of this getting through to you? No, of course not. It was… uh… porno. Yeah, that’s it. My fellow Earthicans, as I have explained in my book ‘Earth in the Balance”, and the much more popular ”Harry Potter and the Balance of Earth’, we need to defend our planet against pollution. Also dark wizards.
Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun! For example, if you killed your grandfather, you’d cease to exist! No! The cat shelter’s on to me. Daddy Bender, we’re hungry. Is the Space Pope reptilian!? Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.”
All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school! When I was first asked to make a film about my nephew, Hubert Farnsworth, I thought “Why should I?” Then later, Leela made the film. But if I did make it, you can bet there would have been more topless women on motorcycles. Roll film! You mean while I’m sleeping in it? No. We’re on the top. Yeah, lots of people did. Hello Morbo, how’s the family?